Before Your Relationship Goes Too Far…

Are you, once again, getting involved with the "wrong" kind of partner? These same frustrating relationship patterns can often seem hopeless. The question you ask yourself, of course, is "Why? Why do I keep getting involved with the same kind of men/women?"

Consider this. There is a definition of insanity that says insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results. Maybe you need to recognize some of the early warning signs as something you have seen before. Or maybe you are aware of these warning signs but rationalize them away for fear of losing what you have. Whatever it is, you are attracted to that "bad" trait or traits in men/women, traits that lead to unhealthy relationships.

Avoid repeating harmful patterns by recognizing the danger signs early. The earlier you see the signs, the easier it is to avoid getting hurt emotionally. Change is not comfortable. Many people will stay in a "bad" relationship simply because it is comfortable. But if you want to have a healthy relationship, you will have to learn to make some slight changes. You might want to redirect your first conversations with people you find attractive towards screening for unwanted traits.

It should be your goal to unveil his/her crucial issues, issues that killed off your previous relationship(s). If your ex was an alcoholic, for example, watch how much he/she drinks and how important alcohol is in his/her life. Be casual and not make it sound like you're interrogating him/her. Keep in mind that he/she will have no idea what you are thinking, only that you are having light conversation.

Just try finding out about those issues that have impacted your past relationships negatively. Regardless of how attracted you are to a man/woman, don't rationalize the red flags waving in front of your eyes. Making excuses for these will lend itself to the same results you had the last time.